“Warts and All….”

Sometimes I revel in the moment by moment gyrations of my teenaged daughter’s life. And, sometimes I am thankful that I don’t have time to, give but a little lip service. A colleague once offended me by telling me I didn’t have a “real” family…because I only have one child. And, by example he told me how 2 parents facing anything less than 3 kids (at which point they were “playing a zone defense”) didn’t know the real challenges of family life. We chuckled when he “shared” that wisdom with me 10 years ago. But I’ve never really lost the opinion, that he was a bit of, what my Dad would have called “A Horses Necktie”. For you see, now having played “Man to Man Defense” for a number of years – – allow me to continue with the team sports metaphor –I realize, what many that have been,“out on that island”, have realized; and that is, that there is more at stake. When you are playing – man to man – with an only child, your mistakes are magnified. Your modeling is magnified, your lapses in coverage …by definition… can not go unnoticed….and as sure as I am, that Peter Pan’s shadow never came unattached to him (or her, lol), I know that, as the parent of an only child, you are never alone! Every time you answer the phone, every conversation you have with another adult, every public interaction, and every time you make the choice to partake in an adult vice…. you are teaching that kid. And, as a direct by-product, you never get to say of their behavior – when they are out and about -….”Oh, they’re just kids…”

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